emerging from silence...

photo by jag

Emerging from silence is never easy for me.  I struggle with it. Every. Single. Time.  And this time is no different.  Although, I must admit, I did not reach a very deep level of internal silence during this retreat.  I'm in a creative phase right now... a fertile time of ideas with a mind that resists slowing down.  What I did manage, however, was to honour my need for a physical slowing down.  In other words...

I slept.
And slept.
And slept.

Then I had a nap.

I had moments of stillness of body where I would just... 

sit
and listen
and ponder.

photo by jag

I went to the woods and made direct contact with the trees and the mulch-y forest floor. 

I breathed in the spicy aroma.

I attended a concert featuring a solo performance by a young robin perched upon the top branch of the endlessly tall pine tree outside my room window.

And I prayed some goodbyes.


The recent death of my aunt brought me back in touch with other losses that had not been properly or fully acknowledged.  "Blessed are those who mourn, for they shall be comforted."

And I was.

It sounds much to simplistic to say "I am grateful" for my time at Stillpoint.  So I won't just speak my gratitude.

I will stand in it.
I will claim it and own it.
I will pray it.
I will express it by doing my best to fully accept and live the day I am given.

I will breathe it in.
I will breathe it out.

gratefully yours,
jag